So, you’re out with a woman for the first or second or third time and you’re starting to feel a connection. You might be looking at her as Ms. Right, or at least Ms. Right now. Either way, you want to be able to make your move and try to seal the deal.
For many men, this is that grey area where they struggle and, often times, this is also where they blow a big opportunity to start a lasting relationship with someone or at least a night of good, wholesome, fun-for-the-whole-family, naked fun.
What’s a guy to do? You have to ask yourself who do you want to be. Do you want to be the guy who goes home with the girl? The world is filled with guys sequestered to a life of video games, cold cereal and mom’s basement. Guess what? Those guys don’t get the girl. At least not the ones they really want.
They’re putting out the signs and the successful men are able to pick up those signs.
The big question is how to tell if a woman is really into you or not. Do not worry my fellow readers, I’m here to reveal all to you. Well, maybe not all because, let’s face it, women are complicated and anyone who thinks they know everything is probably the most ignorant.
There’s probably some pseudo-buddhist bullshit wisdom I could impart to you here, but I’m not trying to help you find the four steps to nirvana, I’m trying to get someone to play with your naughty bits.
So, all sarcasm aside, how do you know that she’s really into you? Women are actually quite adept at putting out the signs they’re interested. Why do you think self-help quacks are millionaires and social media is full of more “strong woman” memes than actual strong women?
They’re putting out the signs and the successful men are able to pick up those signs. Allow me to enlighten you a bit, so you can achieve your own personal state of enlightenment.
6. She’s Not Checking Her Phone
This is actually a pretty easy place to begin to gauge her interest. This applies beyond the dating world as well. If the two of you are having a good conversation, and she is truly interested in what you have to say, then she won’t be lured by the temptation of her buzzing phone.
She’s more interested in what you have to say than the virtual sausage isle of dick pics waiting for her from every Joe Average she decided to swipe right on. You’ve trumped the allure of social media, well-done.
5. Eye Contact
This is the next step in keeping and holding her attention. This reaction is actually a bit of biology and a bit of mental trickery. As she becomes more interested in you, she will relax and her pupils will actually start to dilate a bit. This allows more light in, which allows the brain to take in and process more.
Eye contact shows interest. She is becoming fascinated with you, at least for that moment and it’s a great sign that she is definitely interested.
Easy there cowboy, you’re not quite to that stage yet. Although, touching is a great sign that she’s interested. As the two of you are talking, if she reaches out to touch your arm then you know that she’s showing interest. People don’t generally touch others, although don’t mistake your bosses’ pat on the back for a sign that he wants to play the back nine with you.
Women will initiate the touch, usually on the arm and their touch will linger for an extra second or two than normal. This is a huge sign that she’s interested and one you should not ignore.
I always try to return the touch to gauge their reaction. Again, I’m not talking about groping her in the bar but a touch here and there on the arm or back to see her reaction. If she pulls away or seems to look uncomfortable, then break out the checkers because you’re already in the friend zone. If she smiles or leans into the touch, you’re in the clear.
3. Body Positioning
A woman who likes you will open herself up to you more. She will turn her shoulders to face you or point her knees towards you. Both of these might seem innocuous but, in reality, they are big signals that she is feeling more comfortable and open with you.
Another good indicator is proximity. As the night (or dates) progresses, does she close the gap between the two of you? Intimacy happens within a very close proximity, so the fact that she is making a conscious effort to get closer to you is a great sign that she’s into you. We’ll pause for an obligatory fist bump here. Kudos.
We’ve all seen them flip their hair, adjust their wardrobe, or any other seemingly unimportant tasks when out. However, there are some subtle differences to look for. Does she combine some of the above traits and then flip her hair as well? For example, the two of you are talking and she is leaning in, making eye contact and then makes a point to flip or adjust her hair.
She is sending signs that she is interested. She is subconsciously trying to make herself more presentable for you. Another big sign is if she starts to expose her neck a little more. As people become attracted and aroused, their body temperature begins to rise, so those flushed cheeks and removing of the scarf are more than just signs that the restaurant needs to turn down the heat a bit.
Is she honestly laughing at your jokes and smiling or is she merely being polite? Most people can tell a polite smile or laugh from one that is genuine. How many times have you heard women say they want a guy who can make them laugh?
You can proceed with confidence if you’re with a woman who is enjoying your company enough to laugh at your jokes. It’s a very attractive quality women like in men and you don’t need to spend hours at they gym to be funny.
The next time you find yourself out with a woman, look for these subtle hints that she is interested. Who knows? You might just find yourself with an awesome new girlfriend or a letter worthy of Penthouse forum. Sounds like a win win to me.